Scene: a small theater filled with patrons in evening wear. The house lights dim, the murmur of the audience fades, the curtain parts and spotlights shine on a man standing alone in the center of the stage. He is tall, handsome and dressed in a tuxedo.
“Fornication, feces, vagina”, he says in a conversational voice. The audience quietly awaits his next words. “Fuck, Shit, Cunt” he says in a loud voice. A few members of the audience gasp, one woman pulls her two young girls from their seats and hustles them out of the theater.
When it was apparent that no one else was going to rush out, the speaker continued. “You have known me for less than a minute. Your first impression of me was, I look like a gentleman. Then I said six words. The first three sparked your curiosity and the next three turned me into a peasant disguised as a gentleman.”
“If a stranger says to me Cathy is a selfish, overbearing, bitch. I question Cathy’s character. If he says, Cathy is a cunt. I question the stranger’s character. If he says, Cathy is a vagina. I feel I am being warned by a self-restrained man.”
“Words and their profane synonyms invoke dramatically different responses. Fornication and fuck both describe the same sexual act. Feces and shit both describe the same excrement, vagina and cunt both describe the same female body part. One imagines the first synonym in each pair being uttered by a doctor, the second by a drunk sitting at at bar”.
“Who decided which words were profane and which were not. It wasn’t the lowly laborer, nor the craftsmen nor the educators. It was Royal family members, wealthy merchants and clerical leaders. They use accepted words and manners to prevent outsiders from infiltrating their ranks.”
“The Old list of profane words remains unchanged despite the efforts of the internet Mean Girls and Partisans who continually try to bully others into changing the definition of commonly used words.
“I recently found a clutch of women who have declared the word moist to be a dirty word. They forbid each other and everyone they encounter, from using it.”
“Political partisans have formed their own Word-Police-Squads with the aim of making elections about feelings, not issues. Words without reason or logic can change a person’s feelings. I think I proved that with my six-word opening, but they cannot change a person’s position on issues.”
Leave a Reply